Saturday, December 12, 2015
Fighting Ageism in the Twitter Era (Getting Old Isn't All That Bad)
Photo: Defying negative impact of ageism in America, intergenerational advocates recently met at the Justice In Aging conference in Washington, D.C.
ORLANDO, Fla.--The baby boomers, AKA the nation’s silver tsunami, had better pay as much attention to changing attitudes about aging as they did to shaking up all those previous social norms.
In American culture, old things get replaced with something nice and new: Like the latest smart phone.
Apply the concept to people, and it’s called ageism.
It’s as current as Twitter.
Tweeted Ageist Stereotypes
A team of researchers at Oregon State University took a look at tweets about people with Alzheimer’s disease and found ridicule, stigma and stereotypes.
One unpleasant tweet: “Waiting until your grandparents become senile so you can trick them into giving you their money.”
Ageism came up frequently at November’s 68th Annual Scientific Meeting of the Gerontological Society of America, in Orlando, Fla. The conference brought together science, medical, social science and behavior experts, as well as policy wonks and other researchers.
I was there on a Journalists in Aging Fellowship, a program of New America Media and the Gerontological Society, sponsored by the Archstone Foundation.
Experts from all over the world discussed research into the challenges of the old, the frail and those with dementia.
They talked about minorities and the poor, who, after a lifetime of being disadvantaged in our society, will face particular difficulties as they age, including the need to rely on at-risk safety net and entitlement programs.
Those in the middle class also face poor nutrition in “food deserts” and isolation in their cul-de-sac suburban neighborhoods. Even some retirement communities, built as havens from the hustle and bustle, are less than ideal places to “age in place.”
Yet, the vast majority of Americans say that’s what they want: to stay in their homes.
Boomers Internalize Stereotypes
This is where baby boomers may face their own internalized ageist stereotypes.
Stephen Golant, author of Aging in the Right Place, (Health Professions Press, 2015) said Americans are “repeatedly lectured” about how to “age successfully.” They are told the importance of remaining young in mind and body: To exercise. To eat right. To maintain their homes.
This can be pernicious, he said. It suggests those who are not healthy have only themselves to blame. People guilt-trip themselves even more when the demands of homeownership make them feel like life is spinning out of control.
The perceived stigma of giving up one’s home for a “home” can make life an “emotional battlefield,” Golant said.
Meanwhile, society does its best to accent the negative.
Asked to characterize the aging, some people recorded during on-the-street interviews dredged up cliches about spry retirees on vacation, but most talked about decline, disease, dependency.
“Society isn’t betting on them,” said one man.
The FrameWorks Institute did the interviews as part of its work with eight national aging organizations.
The groups are the Gerontological Society, AARP, American Federation for Aging Research, National Council on Aging, National Hispanic Council on Aging, American Society on Aging, American Geriatrics Society and Grantmakers in Aging.
New Metaphors for Aging
The goal is to find new metaphors for aging, said FrameWorks CEO Nathaniel Kendall-Taylor.
He said the way information is framed has an impact on how people use the information, which should come as no surprise to those who reframed cultural norms about race, gender, sex, the environment and entertainment.
The baby boomers have a lot at stake, and that includes me. I’m no fan of euphemisms, but I’m all for promoting a fine-wine view of life. It should get better with age. We should feel better about aging.
If some creative wordsmithing and mass marketing helps our society recognize that aging doesn’t diminish value or humanity, it would be a real contribution to our collective understanding of who we boomers are.
Linda Valdez wrote this article for the Arizona Republic, where she is a columnist and editorial writer. She is the author of the new book, Crossing the Line: A Marriage Across Borders (Texas Christian University Press).
Full Article & Source:
Fighting Ageism in the Twitter Era (Getting Old Isn't All That Bad)
State judicial board won't drop investigation of judge
HARRISBURG, Pa. - The body that investigates misconduct allegations against Pennsylvania judges soon will decide whether charges are warranted against state Supreme Court Justice Michael Eakin.
The Judicial Conduct Board on Tuesday denied a request by Eakin’s lawyer to stop its investigation and send the case directly to the Court of Judicial Discipline.
Board member James Schwartzman said the request isn’t allowed under state rules.
Schwartzman said the board is required to investigate so it can determine if charges are warranted and then make the case to the court.
Eakin is being investigated for his role in an explicit email ring that also involved other judges and the state attorney general’s office.
He’s publicly apologized for what he’s described as insensitive and out of character emails.
The Judicial Conduct Board is an independent body of state residents, comprised of three judges, three lawyers and six non-lawyers. Half its members are chosen by the governor and half by the Pennsylvania Supreme Court.
The board's job is to investigate complaints about judicial misconduct. Those investigations can result in formal charges being filed against a judge or a justice.
The board then presents its case to the Court of Judicial Discipline, which determines if a judge or justice should be suspended, removed from office or otherwise disciplined.
Full Article & Source:
State judicial board won't drop investigation of judge
Judges and Their Watchdog in a Calm Patch
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| Victoria Henley, Commission on Judicial Performance |
Inflamed by what they saw as instances of overdiscipline and the harsh tone of some private advisory letters, judges were talking to legislators about measures to curb the commission's power. One justice called his colleagues' anger "palpable."
The legislation never materialized. Lawmakers, it seems, were wary of doing anything that might be portrayed as easing up on bad judges. Some judges, too, feared that initiating a review of disciplinary statutes might open the process to those seeking even more rules and sanctions.
Three years after state judges appeared ready to take on their disciplinarians in a public battle, the anger has ebbed. To be sure, there's still plenty of discontent. But whether it's a sense that the commission is now listening to judges' long-standing concerns or resignation that the system isn't going to change, the open calls for intervention have stopped—for now at least.
"The grumbling continues," said Thomas Hollenhorst, an associate justice on the Fourth District Court of Appeal and a veteran judicial ethics instructor. "The next time you see some really, truly outlandish discipline handed down, it will all come back."
MORE INFORMATION FOR JUDGES
Erica Yew, the chairwoman of the Commission on Judicial Performance and a judge on the Santa Clara County Superior Court, is trying to make sure that doesn't happen. Based on what she's heard from many conversations, Yew said she believes that tensions between the CJP and judges have eased, and she hopes that's at least a partial result of efforts to demystify what it is the agency does."I think part of the angst comes from not understanding the process," Yew said. "We now go to courts that invite us. We're doing outreach to groups that we've never talked to before, the public defenders association, district attorneys, ethnic bars."
Yew said she's reinstituted meetings between the CJP and presiding judges to answer their questions. She also meets with judicial leaders at training sessions for presiding judges, court executive officers and supervising judges. (Continue)
Full Article & Source:
Judges and Their Watchdog in a Calm Patch
Friday, December 11, 2015
Hospital Trying to Seize Guardianship of Disabled Patient From His Family in Order to Kill Him
A Houston, Texas hospital is attempting to seize guardianship of a disabled patient shown in a shocking video begging to stay alive. Chris Dunn has received national attention over a video showing him begging and praying to stay alive and to now have Methodist Hospital remove his life-sustaining medical treatment that it wants to remove.
Yesterday, the attorneys representing Evelyn Kelly contested Methodist Hospital’s application for custodial guardianship of Evelyn’s adult son, Chris Dunn. Kelly is his Medical Power of Attorney and trying to ensure that Chris continues to receive life-sustaining treatments that the hospital is attempting to remove. Methodist has invoked the statutory process found in the Texas Advanced Directives Act (TADA-Chapter 166.046 of the Health & Safety Code), which allows the hospital to override medical directives of a patient and provide only ten days’ notice before involuntarily withdrawing life-sustaining treatment.
Even if a patient is conscious, able to communicate, walk, or pay for his own care, Texas law authorizes hospitals and physicians to override the medical decisions of a patient and remove care, including food and water, after providing the required ten days’ notice.
Officials with Texas Right to Life informed LifeNews today that Dunn’s only recourse is to find another facility that will offer him an ICU bed – a daunting task on a rushed time frame for anyone, but even more so when the hospital has determined to end your life.
“Last week, Chris’s mother was granted a second two-week extension of the 10 day period to find another facility, a task made even more difficult because the hospital will not provide a diagnosis of Chris’s condition. The same day the extension was granted, however, Methodist filed an injunction seeking custodial guardianship of Chris. The hospital is thus attempting to prevent Evelyn from representing her son and defending his right to continue receiving care,” the pro-life group said.
The pro-life group added:
In November when the hospital initially attempted to remove care, Evelyn contacted Texas Right to Life, which has assisted the family in the difficult legal process and provided legal assistance. Yesterday, the lawyers representing Chris and Evelyn, Trey Trainor and Joe Nixon, contested Methodist Hospital’s attempt to seize guardianship. Trainor and Nixon are the same lawyers who appear in video documentation of Chris communicating his desire to continue receiving treatment and for his mother’s attorneys to fight on his behalf. In court documents filed today, Trainor and Nixon note this video evidence that Chris is alert and responsive, only intermittently sedated depending on the dosage of medication.
The court documents filed yesterday reveal that Justine Moore, an employee of Methodist Hospital, applied to be Chris’s Permanent Guardian. As Trainor and Nixon note, Chris lived with his mother before his illness and has since indicated that he would prefer her to speak on his behalf before anyone else. Furthermore, as a former EMT, Chris is well aware of what life-sustaining treatment entails. When asked explicitly if he wants to continue receiving such care, he clearly communicated that he does.
Finally, and most shockingly, Trainor and Nixon point to the inappropriate nature of Moore’s application for guardianship. Moore was the very same employee who revealed to Evelyn the hospital’s desire to remove care. She cannot therefore be an impartial guardian, and there is evidence that she would in fact be acting directly contrary to Chris’s wishes for his own medical care.
Texas Right to Life condemns Houston Methodist Hospital’s legal maneuvering to force their anti-Life quality of life judgments upon Chris. Until now, the hospital has been hiding behind the unethical, unconstitutional, and unprecedented Texas law; however, now that a judge has shown skepticism at the process allowed by law, the hospital is going out of their way to remove the little legal protection Chris still has, his Medical Power of Attorney. This reveals the lengths to which this hospital will go to ensure that the final authority of these Life and death decisions remain in the hands of the physicians and hospital that does not see Chris’s life as worth living.Dunn is one of countless Texans who have been victimized by the draconian Texas Advance Directives Act (TADA), enacted by the Texas Legislature in 1999. The law – which benefits the medical lobby and jeopardizes medically vulnerable Texans – protects the financial and discriminatory interests of hospitals and physicians by abrogating the civil liberties of patients.
As Texas Right to Life explains about the law: “When a hospital or physician determines for any reason that they disagree with a patient’s decision about his or her own medical treatment and invokes TADA, Texas law protects those healthcare providers as they remove life-sustaining treatment from the patient even when doing so means overriding the patient’s desire and right to live—and even when the treatment is benefitting the patient. The law does not require that the hospital inform the patient or family about the reasons or basis for the removal of treatment, which could include financial reasons, discrimination, or subjective quality of life value judgments about the life of the patient.”
Full Article & Source:
Hospital Trying to Seize Guardianship of Disabled Patient From His Family in Order to Kill Him
Thursday, December 10, 2015
Man Pleads For Bilking Three Elderly Women
STUDIO CITY—The Los Angeles County District Attorney’s Office announced on December 1 that 30-year-old Jovanny Malka of North Hollywood entered a no contest plea for bilking three elderly women out of thousands of dollars, while claiming to assist them in obtaining a mortgage modification.
Starting from April 2012 to November 2013, Malka took more than $50,000 from three women ages 67, 69, and 72, prosecutors stated. He was facing a total of 6 felony county that included three counts of theft from elder or dependent adult exceeding $950.
According to a press release from the Los Angeles County District Attorney’s Office, Malka, who pleaded to one count of grand theft of personal property exceeding $950, will pay restitution in full to all three victims as part of the negotiated plea. One of the victims lost more than $48,000 in the scheme.
Malka is set to face three years of formal probation and 30 days of community labor at a sentencing hearing scheduled for January 8 at the San Fernando Branch of Los Angeles County Superior Court.
The Los Angeles Police Department Foothill Station is continuing to investigate the case.
Full Article & Source:
Man Pleads For Bilking Three Elderly Women
Wednesday, December 9, 2015
Trying mediation to stem family feuds
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| Former 12th Judicial Circuit Chief Judge Lee Haworth |
When bad blood runs in the family of an elder who develops dementia or frailty, the situation can slither downhill fast.
Entrenched rivalries and
resentments only complicate the thorny question of how best to care for a
vulnerable older parent or spouse. One brother may suspect another of
financial exploitation, or an adult stepdaughter may accuse her mother’s
second husband of neglect or even abuse.
If
the dispute reaches a point where attorneys are consulted or
authorities called, the likely result is an adult guardianship process
that strips the elder of any legal right to make decisions, and places a
relative or professional in full charge of his or her finances,
personal life and health care. The more complicated and deep-seated the
family feud, the more likely it is that a probate judge will appoint an
outsider to act as guardian.
“I’ve
served in every division,” says former 12th Judicial Circuit Chief
Judge Lee Haworth, who retired in August after 26 years. “But the anger
that burns in probate cases burns incandescent.”
Divorce
court can get ugly, too, he adds, “but there you only usually have two
parties. Here, you can have dozens. You can imagine all the slights that
a sibling experienced — all those things bubble to the surface when the
adult parent becomes incapacitated. All those hostilities, all those
concerns about where the estate’s going to go, get very intense.”
Families unhappy with Florida’s probate system say that instead of resolving discord, guardianship can make matters worse. They tell stories of intrusive professional oversight that depletes an elder’s life savings, while restricting the ward’s access to friends and relatives. They have sought, and obtained, limited reforms of the process in the Legislature.
Now the 12th circuit — with courts in Sarasota and Manatee counties — is one of eight Florida districts embarking on a new experiment with potential to stem the costly and bitter litigation that can erupt in guardianship cases. If successful, it could one day help families settle differences without resorting to probate court.
Eldercaring coordination is a conflict resolution method that brings all interested parties to one table for the purpose of developing a caregiving plan. Modeled on a concept used successfully in high-conflict divorce cases — parenting coordination — it is the product of a two-year collaboration among 20 Florida organizations, and 21 more on the national level.
Fifth Circuit Judge Michelle T. Morley, with Linda Fieldstone, director of family court services in the 11th Circuit, steered the Florida and national task forces to the pilot project stage. In addition to the eight Florida circuits, four state systems — Indian, Idaho, Ohio and Minnesota — are testing the value of treating incapacitated adults as family members who need care, instead of probate prizes to be fought over.
“The idea of a one-size-fits-all system for everybody is just not appropriate,” Fieldstone says of the guardianship process. “It shouldn’t be an adversarial system. We don’t do that with younger families; we shouldn’t be doing that with older families.”
Haworth is acting as administrator for this circuit, referring cases for possible resolution by one of three coordinators during the two-year pilot project. Each district has been asked to handle at least six cases in that period, and the results will be evaluated by academic researchers. The goal is to save time, money and angst, while concentrating on the elder’s safety and autonomy.
“Everyone says in the courtroom, ‘I’m here for my mom’s best interests.’ It’s really different when you sit down and you’re asked to present a plan together,” says Erika Dine, a Bradenton elder law attorney who will lead the three-person team, and is already working on her first case.
The other two local coordinators are retired New Jersey judge and mediator Karimu Hill-Harvey of Myakka City, and Debra K. Carter, a Sarasota psychologist, mediator and parent coordinator. The requirements for the job are rigorous, including at least a master’s degree, experience in a related field, and weeks of specialized training.
“It’s putting the solution back in the family’s hands, with the assistance of the eldercaring coordinator,” Dine explains. “As the coordinator, I can bring in experts and say, ‘Let’s sit together here and figure out what is the best plan, without you having to go to annihilation in court.'”
Haworth heard about the concept from Morley, and brought it to Chief Judge Charles Williams this summer. Around the same time, Dine says, she and a fellow attorney approached Williams to ask whether the collaborative approach used in family court might apply to adult guardianship cases.
These discussions coincided, Haworth says, with Herald-Tribune articles “about some of the problems about guardianship. Judge Williams is very interested in making sure the guardianship program is working in the best interests of these incapacitated people. He said, ‘This looks great; let’s try it.'”
Haworth says he is “cautiously optimistic” about eldercare coordination, despite two major hurdles. Because the method is experimental and not court-ordered, all family members must volunteer to participate. And because it’s unfunded, each participant will foot a portion of the cost — although coordinators may do some work pro bono.
“If one person refuses, that’s the end of it; the model is set up that you have to buy into it,” Haworth says. “The second thing is the money thing. I think that’s actually easier than the first one, because you can sell the idea that it’s going to be cheaper than litigation.”
The concept’s success, he believes, will depend on the coordinators chosen to implement it.
“It takes special people to do this; it takes a compassionate person who also has to follow legal principles,” he says. Embattled families are “so angry at the whole process, and don’t want to spend any more money, and that’s something the eldercare coordinator is going to have to overcome.” (Continue Reading)
Families unhappy with Florida’s probate system say that instead of resolving discord, guardianship can make matters worse. They tell stories of intrusive professional oversight that depletes an elder’s life savings, while restricting the ward’s access to friends and relatives. They have sought, and obtained, limited reforms of the process in the Legislature.
Now the 12th circuit — with courts in Sarasota and Manatee counties — is one of eight Florida districts embarking on a new experiment with potential to stem the costly and bitter litigation that can erupt in guardianship cases. If successful, it could one day help families settle differences without resorting to probate court.
Eldercaring coordination is a conflict resolution method that brings all interested parties to one table for the purpose of developing a caregiving plan. Modeled on a concept used successfully in high-conflict divorce cases — parenting coordination — it is the product of a two-year collaboration among 20 Florida organizations, and 21 more on the national level.
Fifth Circuit Judge Michelle T. Morley, with Linda Fieldstone, director of family court services in the 11th Circuit, steered the Florida and national task forces to the pilot project stage. In addition to the eight Florida circuits, four state systems — Indian, Idaho, Ohio and Minnesota — are testing the value of treating incapacitated adults as family members who need care, instead of probate prizes to be fought over.
“The idea of a one-size-fits-all system for everybody is just not appropriate,” Fieldstone says of the guardianship process. “It shouldn’t be an adversarial system. We don’t do that with younger families; we shouldn’t be doing that with older families.”
Haworth is acting as administrator for this circuit, referring cases for possible resolution by one of three coordinators during the two-year pilot project. Each district has been asked to handle at least six cases in that period, and the results will be evaluated by academic researchers. The goal is to save time, money and angst, while concentrating on the elder’s safety and autonomy.
“Everyone says in the courtroom, ‘I’m here for my mom’s best interests.’ It’s really different when you sit down and you’re asked to present a plan together,” says Erika Dine, a Bradenton elder law attorney who will lead the three-person team, and is already working on her first case.
The other two local coordinators are retired New Jersey judge and mediator Karimu Hill-Harvey of Myakka City, and Debra K. Carter, a Sarasota psychologist, mediator and parent coordinator. The requirements for the job are rigorous, including at least a master’s degree, experience in a related field, and weeks of specialized training.
“It’s putting the solution back in the family’s hands, with the assistance of the eldercaring coordinator,” Dine explains. “As the coordinator, I can bring in experts and say, ‘Let’s sit together here and figure out what is the best plan, without you having to go to annihilation in court.'”
Haworth heard about the concept from Morley, and brought it to Chief Judge Charles Williams this summer. Around the same time, Dine says, she and a fellow attorney approached Williams to ask whether the collaborative approach used in family court might apply to adult guardianship cases.
These discussions coincided, Haworth says, with Herald-Tribune articles “about some of the problems about guardianship. Judge Williams is very interested in making sure the guardianship program is working in the best interests of these incapacitated people. He said, ‘This looks great; let’s try it.'”
Haworth says he is “cautiously optimistic” about eldercare coordination, despite two major hurdles. Because the method is experimental and not court-ordered, all family members must volunteer to participate. And because it’s unfunded, each participant will foot a portion of the cost — although coordinators may do some work pro bono.
“If one person refuses, that’s the end of it; the model is set up that you have to buy into it,” Haworth says. “The second thing is the money thing. I think that’s actually easier than the first one, because you can sell the idea that it’s going to be cheaper than litigation.”
The concept’s success, he believes, will depend on the coordinators chosen to implement it.
“It takes special people to do this; it takes a compassionate person who also has to follow legal principles,” he says. Embattled families are “so angry at the whole process, and don’t want to spend any more money, and that’s something the eldercare coordinator is going to have to overcome.” (Continue Reading)
Trying mediation to stem family feuds
'I failed the judiciary,' judge reportedly says at his discipline hearing
TRENTON — Former Mercer County Presiding Judge Gerald Council apologized to the state Supreme Court Wednesday during a hearing on his disciplinary case, in which he is accused of inappropriately touching and demeaning a subordinate, the New Jersey Law Journal reported.
"I'm embarrassed to be here," Council told the high court, reported by the New Jersey Law Journal. "I don't know how I ended up being here. I failed the judiciary. I failed my family. I've worked hard to be the best judge I can be," he said. "I certainly meant no malice nor harm to anyone."
In September, the state's Advisory Committee on Judicial Conduct (ACJC), in a 56-page presentment, found "clear and convincing" evidence that Council inappropriately touched a court employee twice in 2012, which led to her being demeaned, belittled and publicly humiliated.
The committee recommended Council - who has since transferred to Middlesex County - be suspended for one month and possibly removed from his leadership role. The committee then sent the matter to the Supreme Court for a hearing.
The law journal reported ACJC Counsel Tracie Gelbstein asked the Supreme Court on Wednesday to suspend Council for one month without pay for his "highly offensive" behavior.
Council's attorney, Alan Bowman, said Council understands that the charges against him are serious and that he carries "the mantle of the public trust," the law journal reported.
The incidents in which Council allegedly touched the employee, identified only as A.J, occurred in a two-week period in 2012 during and after sessions of Mercer County Drug Court, which Council led.
The first, during a social event for a new judge in the courthouse, witnesses told the committee that Council put his hand on A.J's upper back in an effort to move her out of the room and directed her to get back to work, the ACJC committee report said.
The second incident, which the committee found more egregious, occurred after a drug court staff meeting. Council grabbed A.J.'s ear and pulled her from the room, saying, "come on, come on," the committee alleged.
One witness heard Council refer to the employee as, "my troubled child" as he led her out.
In November, Council sought and was granted a transfer to the family division of the Middlesex County Superior Court.
Superior Court Judge Peter Warshaw took over Council's position as the new presiding judge in Mercer County.
Full Article & Source:
'I failed the judiciary,' judge reportedly says at his discipline hearing
Police: Massachusetts woman faked 'terminal brain tumor' to bilk elderly man out of thousands of dollars
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| Anisa Llega |
Arlington Police Chief Frederick Ryan said 24-year-old Anisa Llega was arrested Wednesday on larceny charges in connection with a scheme to exploit more than $100,000 from the 84-year-old man, whose identity was withheld.
About three months ago, Llega began working as a house cleaner for the victim, who would frequent a local restaurant where she worked as a waitress. During that time, Llega cultivated a relationship with the man, eventually conning him out of large sums of money, according to Ryan.
At one point, Llega faked a terminal brain tumor to extract money from the man, who gave her $30,000 for a surgical procedure she did not require, police said. Rather than go under the knife, Llega used the money for a Florida vacation, according to investigators.
"This is a particularly sad situation in which the victim has no family," Ryan said, adding that Llega took advantage of the elderly man's "kindness and generosity."
Police froze several bank accounts in Llega's name as a result of the investigation, which was launched after an acquaintance of the victim told them about Llega. She is expected to be arraigned Thursday in Cambridge District Court. It's unknown if she has a lawyer.
Ryan said more charges may be filed.
Full Article & Source:
Police: Massachusetts woman faked 'terminal brain tumor' to bilk elderly man out of thousands of dollars
Tuesday, December 8, 2015
A late-in-life friendship and a lost opportunity to say 'you matter'
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| Elaine Ellbogen |
Elaine Ellbogen refused to be confined, even while under a
court-appointed guardianship.
At 85, she often signed herself out of her Libertyville
nursing home, walked to the Metra station and took the train to Chicago. She'd
board a bus, then window-shop along Michigan Avenue or stop in art stores and
greet the proprietors, who became friends.
She showed up at the Tribune Tower one frigid February
afternoon, after talking to me only once before by telephone.
She wanted her independence, she said. She wanted to punish
the people who had forced her out of her Highland Park home, citing her
inability to care for herself. "I do not believe I should be under
guardianship," she said.
That day earlier this year marked the beginning of a short
friendship that ended with tragedy, and proved to me, once again, that people
can be amazingly complex.
Elaine dressed fashionably, wearing a scarf and a splash of
red lipstick that offset a crown of white hair. Articulate, witty, and
dramatic, she quoted literature and discussed current events each time we met.
She spoke about working as an account executive in the 1950s
for Daniel Edelman's public relations firm in Chicago. Much like the era was depicted
in the "Mad Men" series, it was unusual to find a woman in that role
at the time. For Elaine, it clearly remained a source of great pride.
She left her job within a few years to marry and raise two
sons in Highland Park, filling the home with artwork and staying active with
her children's activities. At one point, she tried to get back into the public
relations world, but too much time had slipped by.
By the 1980s, when her sons left for college, Elaine's
collections of artwork, newspapers, mail and clothing from frequent shopping
sprees became unwieldy.
That was when the hoarding began and her marriage unraveled,
said her son Andrew Ellbogen. Elaine stopped allowing family members in the
house, which was in dire need of repairs. One side of the roof was caving in
and mold was spreading throughout the home.
"Early on, the art covered walls at home," Andrew
said. "In later years, the artwork was on the floor when she ran out of
wall space."
After a small fire in the home, her family members begged
her to move, offering options and financial help. They asked the city of
Highland Park to intervene, but Elaine refused to move or clean up the house as
needed for its sale. When I asked Elaine later if she considered herself a
hoarder, she replied, "That is a matter of interpretation."
Eventually, a phone repairman who was allowed entrance to
the house was so disturbed by what he saw that he took photographs and sent
them to city officials, who contacted the guardian's office, Andrew said.
And so in 2011, the private guardian removed Elaine from her
home by having her declared disabled in court. The guardian took control of her
finances and major decisions regarding her life. This was a drastic step, and
Elaine did not handle it well, feeling betrayed and lied to by the guardian.
She started to write letters, compelling and coherent in
tidy cursive handwriting. She addressed them to a Lake County judge, a former
presidential candidate and to news reporters, including myself.
"Awakened at 7:40 a.m. by pounding on my front door, I
was informed by (guardian) that she would personally return me to my home in
one hour if I would accompany her to the Highland Park hospital to answer a few
doctor's questions," she wrote in one four-page letter.
"I never saw my home again," she wrote. "Thus
began my surreal Kafka-like agonizing true story. I am a real-life example of
the horrifying fate that can befall a low-income, elderly woman."
I was interested in learning more about guardianships, which
are often necessary to obtain help for people who are incapacitated, but can
also be abused.
But Elaine's case, as I soon learned, was no simple matter.
She did not suffer dementia, as some court records stated, though she had
received psychiatric care and was not taking her medication as prescribed.
Elaine was moved into a skilled nursing home in Libertyville
in 2013, after a year of failed attempts to move her into a less-restrictive
setting, such as assisted living, court records state. "She was resistant
to the limits placed on her for spending and outings," the guardian wrote,
describing her as verbally abusive.
The last time I saw Elaine, at a coffee shop near her
nursing home, she spoke about the Oscar Wilde play, "A Woman of No
Importance" and her fear, after guardianship "that I was nothing now.
That I was absolutely unwanted, destroyed."
Yet she seemed happier than on past occasions. After her
funds ran out, the state took over Elaine's guardianship, and authorities were
working on moving her to an apartment. She was allowed more freedom, and
continued to leave the nursing home for short excursions.
She had begun piling papers and items in the private room
she had at the nursing home, and clothes still carrying their tags hung along
the wall. She had made some friends and enjoyed a good relationship with her
ex-husband, her son Andrew said.
"The goal was always to let her have as much
independence as possible," he said.
So, it was shocking to learn that, on June 2, Elaine left
for a shopping trip and never returned home.
She had been struck by a train in Deerfield, and was not
identified until a day later. Her death was ruled an accident by the Lake
County coroner's office.
"She just miscalculated crossing the tracks," said
Orlando Portillo, chief deputy coroner.
Her family members remain horrified that she met such a
violent end, despite their attempts to keep her safe. She had been looking
forward to her granddaughter's upcoming dance recital, Andrew said.
I couldn't stop thinking about her after learning the news.
She had astonished me with her eloquence and mobility, and I enjoyed our
visits. While I initially questioned why she was under a guardian's care, I
began to understand why her family had become frustrated and sought the city's
help.
Despite her eccentricities — or maybe because of them — I
was touched by her and considered her a "woman of importance."
I wish she had lived long enough for me to tell her that.
Full Article & Source:
A late-in-life friendship and a lost opportunity to say 'you matter'
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