But
Elvis is there with them. And Johnny Cash and Willie Nelson, Glenn
Miller and Glen Campbell (and Kelly Clarkson, too). The Eagles keep them
company, and the Stones, even Pink Floyd.
On Radio Recliner, a new online
radio station, the DJs are elderly folks who have spent the past two
months stuck in their rooms, meals delivered to their doors, activities
canceled, their relatives relegated to waving through a window, at best.
At a time of great fear and risk — old-age home residents make up about
40 percent of the nation’s deaths from the virus — the disc jockeys get
to tell stories of better times as they spin their favorite tunes, from
Elvis and ’40s big band tunes to ’60s rock (including the hard stuff)
and a whole lot of love songs.
“We don’t
have time to be sad, not at our age,” DJ M&M — real name: Marion
Murray — tells her audience of nursing home residents and the relatives
who worry about them. “We got to keep moving. It’s too important to just
sit in a chair and fall asleep.”
Virginia
Hawsey, broadcasting as DJ Ginger Bee, describes the imaginary road
trips she and her next-door neighbor take from their rooms to the beach.
Theresa Carter chose DJ Happy Feet as her on-air moniker because, even
at 89, she still believes in the power of dance, in how a rumba can
electrify even the loneliest person.
They’re stuck in rooms where the TV delivers a diet of disease and fear,
and the phone cannot replace the hugs and laughs that used to be just
down the hall. Yet on Radio Recliner, the tunes are chipper, the patter
is cheery, and the people behind the microphones are chock full of
stories that put this whole wretched mess out of mind, at least for a
bit.
Lois Pixley, left, who goes by DJ Miss Fancy Pants, and John Gait. Both are DJs on Radio Recliner. (Photo by Radio Recliner) |
The DJs have been here before — not precisely, but close enough. They
spent childhood summers trapped inside because going out meant being
exposed to the polio virus. They suffered months-long interruptions of
love affairs because their fella was shipped off to war. And in the last
chapter of their lives, they ended up in these places — pleasant
enough, they say, but still, a difficult, final pivot from homes they
knew and loved.
Every hour
of Radio Recliner is packed with what was on the air when they first
fell in love, when they learned that heartache is one of those words
that doesn’t come close to describing what it really feels like.
“Isolation
is really a hard thing for seniors in the best of times,” said Mitch
Bennett, chief creative officer at Luckie, the marketing company that
puts together Radio Recliner for Bridge Senior Living,
a company that owns about two dozen retirement homes. “Now they can’t
even get together and see each other for meals. But they all grew up
with this dedication-style radio, where you can send a message to loved
ones and tell stories with music, and it’s a kind of magic. And most of
them are literally doing it from their recliners.”
Anyone
can listen to the station at RadioRecliner.com, but the target audience
is the more than 2 million Americans who live in old-age facilities and
the many more family members who have been unable to visit elderly
relatives since the virus hit hard. Relatives can call in, record their
requests and dedicate songs to isolated elders.
About
three dozen DJs have recorded sets, originally from homes owned by
Bridge, but now from facilities across the country. They perform their
patter by phone and professional producers then insert the music and the
Radio Recliner jingle and stitch together shows that stream
around-the-clock.
These first-time DJs know what to do. They grew up listening to shows like the “Make Believe Ballroom,” whose DJ pretended to be the emcee at a swanky Manhattan nightclub where the hottest bands played every night; and Wolfman Jack’s growling narration of the night from a pirate station somewhere deep in Mexico; and Cousin Brucie’s teen club of the airwaves, where every kid in the country was your cuz and Brucie was the older kid who made you feel better when that guy in English class wouldn’t return your glance.
Now the kids who listened to those shows are taking their turn playing the songs they danced to when they met the One.
Carter,
sitting in her rooms at the Somerby home in Mobile, Ala., chose the big
band sounds she listened to as a little girl in the Bronx. She’d
jitterbug around her apartment when Harry James’s band came on “Make
Believe Ballroom” on WNEW.
“I
married a man who didn’t like to dance,” she said. “But I made him
promise, whenever we went to a wedding, he had to dance with me at least
once.”
They were married for 58 years before he died 11 years ago. He always kept his promise.
Now
alone, working on crossword and jigsaw puzzles, doing exercises along
with an instructor on TV, Carter will play a tune and “even at this
stage of the game, I’ll do a little step,” she said. “Some people don’t
know how to spend the time. The loneliness is the hardest part of being
old. But it’s about how you accept it. I’ve always kept myself busy. And
I have the Lord, and I’m okay with him.”
Bone Coleman, a.k.a. DJ Karaoke Cowboy, left, and Marion Murray — DJ M&M. (Photo by Radio Recliner) |
Murray, 79, used her time on Radio Recliner to recall the music she and
her husband shared. “We were young and he used to sing ‘Peggy Sue’ to
me,” DJ M&M tells her audience. “When he sang that to me, he would
just make my heart . . . just melt. He did sing that so good. It was
just perfect.”
She sings
it out: “Peggy Sue, I love you,” and she giggles, and her voice, grown
scratchy through the years, fades, and up comes Buddy Holly, eternally
young, romancing Peggy Sue, “with a love so rare and true.”
This
is a rough time, M&M says, but she urges listeners to remember what
makes life still worth living. For her, it’s Bubbles the cat, her only
companion in her room at the Enclave in Franklin, Mass.
“I
dedicate ‘Tiny Bubbles’ to my Bubbles because she’s a wonderful cat and
I love her dearly, with all my heart,” she says. “She sleeps with me.
She sits in the chair with me. I mean, we’re just buddies.” And Don Ho’s
1967 lounge hit “Tiny Bubbles” swells, the crooner singing of “a feeling that I’m gonna love you till the end of time.”
Some
of the DJs are in hospice care and some are on memory wards, reserved
for people who have lost much of their identities. But give them their
music and some piece of their former selves emerges, Bennett said.
“The music
gives them a direct line to their deepest memories,” he said. “This is
just the most special thing I’ve been involved with in my career.”
The
music helps, but still, this isolation stinks. Hawsey, 82, who lives in
a Somerby independent living facility in Birmingham, Ala., makes no
bones about it: “I’m ready for them to let us out,” she said. She’s been
stuck in her apartment since March 13. Her daughter, who lives nearby,
can’t visit, except to stand on the sidewalk below Hawsey’s balcony.
No lunches out. No church. No canasta. No visits from the musicians who would come to play guitar and sing with the residents.
She
remembered the summer she was 12, when her older sister could go to the
movies, but Virginia had to stay inside because polio was raging, a
virus that hit little kids hardest. Her sister graduated from high
school that spring, and her father went to the ceremonies, but “Mother
wouldn’t leave me, so she didn’t go.”
“Same
thing this year,” Hawsey said. “Our granddaughter is graduating here,
but her parents are in South Africa and they can’t be here.”
The
loneliness is searing enough that when the home’s lifestyle director
offered Hawsey the chance to be a DJ, she put aside her shyness and
signed up for a visit to her past.
“We
didn’t have TV till I was in the 10th grade,” she said. “We listened to
the radio a lot.” Her station was WJHO in Opelika, Ala., which played
lots of Elvis, though, truth be told, no amount was enough.
There
was no question what Hawsey’s show would sound like. “I was just an
Elvis fan,” she said. “He was the highlight of our days.”
On
Radio Recliner, Hawsey spins the hits, including “All Shook Up” and
“Can’t Help Falling in Love.” (“Do you remember who you were dancing
with when you heard that song?” she asks in her intro.) She throws in
lesser-known numbers, such as “Wooden Heart,” the B side of “Blue
Christmas,” on which Presley sang several lines in German.
There’s an
Elvis for every turn in her life. In 1957, she was a teacher in Apopka,
Fla., and she came home to Alabama for the summer. Her boyfriend
visited for a weekend and her younger sister, eager for him to propose
marriage to Virginia, played Presley’s “Treat Me Nice” all weekend.
“Don’t you ever kiss me once, kiss me twice,” Elvis sang. “Treat me nice.”
The
song didn’t do the trick, Hawsey tells listeners. “It still took him a
year and a half to come about” and pop the question, she says, but the
song remained theirs. They were married for 53 years, until Shelton died
three years ago.
There’s an Elvis for this crazy time, too.
“I
don’t know with the virus if we’re going to get out anywhere this
summer,” Hawsey says, “but we can always dream. With my neighbor next
door, I dreamed these last two months: We’ve been to the beach, we’ve
been to North Carolina — all in our dreams. We’ve talked about what we
saw on the way and how tired we were and how we enjoyed seeing the waves
come in . . . ”
Her
voice drifts off and Elvis beckons, in the 1961 song “Blue Hawaii”:
“Come with me / While the moon is on the sea / The night is young / And
so are we, so are we.”
The DJs try not to be overbearing about it, but the topic of coping with the isolation creeps into nearly every show.
“Whenever
you’re bored or lonely, you just think about singing,” DJ M&M says.
“I don’t mind if you make up a song, like I do.” In addition to
singing, Murray prescribes puzzles and knitting; she’s made a dozen hats
so far and is working on a blanket.
For
Radio Recliner, she put together a six-page list of tunes to share. She
plays Johnny Cash’s “I’ve Been Everywhere,” a catalogue of places you
can’t go these days: “I’ve been everywhere, man / Crossed the deserts
bare, man / I’ve breathed the mountain air, man / Of travel I’ve a’had
my share, man.”
Murray loves the road, too, but she’s all for the great indoors right now.
“I
loved the ocean, too, but please, we’re in our rooms,” she said. “We’re
free of the virus here, knock on wood. Some people here want their
lives back the way they were. I tell them, look, this is serious
business, you don’t want to die. This is a good place to live, not to
die.”
Full Article & Source:
Coronavirus isolated them in their rooms. Now, old-age home residents reconnect by spinning Elvis on the radio.
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